Movie Thoughts: Daybreakers

I have to admit to a certain affection for supernatural thrillers. Vampires, werewolves, demons and the like. I like them. Not to the extent that I like time travel movies - where I pretty much have to see them, even if I know they are gonna suck sour eggs.

I will say that lately I've been avoiding vampire movies - pretty much since the Twighlight movies started up. Those simply can't hold my interest. As someone said - the Twighlight movies turned vampires into sparkly faggots. A sentiment with which I agree.

Daybreakers, however, returns the vampire monster to it's rightful place a something to be feared; but with a Wall Street corruption kind of twist.

Set in a world where vampires have become the norm, and humans have become an endangered species, a small group of humans search for a way to survive, even as the supply of human blood dwindles to nothing.

Daybreakers isn't really a horror film so much as it is a well plotted and well acted thriller. Ethan Hawke, Sam Niell and Will Dafoe star.

The Do-it-yourself LoJack….kinda

Having two working laptops in our house, one of which gets carried around by me quite frequently, I have often worried what I’d do if one of them ends up getting stolen. It happens all the time. I’ve thought of LoJack, but my fears, I guess, just don’t justify the cost.

This is rather cool. Over at TechRepublic, I learned of an open source (read – FREE) software program for Windows, Mac and Linux called “Prey”

The software puts you firmly in the “big brother” seat in the even your laptop is ever stolen. I would assume it would work just as well on a desktop, I don’t know.

Once you install Prey, it will send an email to a email address you specify,in a time interval you specify…say…every 3 minutes,or 10 minutes, or 1 hour. The email will contain information like:

• Computer status
• List of currently running programs
• Network (including Wi-Fi) information
• A screen shot of the desktop
• A picture of the thief (if your laptop has a webcam)

Now, I know what your thinking “Gee, that’s cool, but I don’t wanna fill up my email box when the laptop isn’t stolen.” Well, the folks that created Prey thought of that too. When you setup and configure Prey, you can set it to check a specific URL. If it finds that, it will send the data to the specified email address.

I’m going to download and install this on my laptop this evening, I’ll add a post in the next day or two about the experience. The URL can be a specific web page, something like, say “http:myownhometown.blogspot.com/stolenlappy.htm”. Something you can create as soon as the laptop goes missing.

Mayberry 2.0

We’ve been watching “Eureka” on the SyFy channel for three seasons now, and something I have only just noticed is; “Eureka” is an updated version of “The Andy Griffith Show”. A tad bit about the town; Eureka is a town situated in the mountains – one gets the feeling of the pacific northwest. Built and funded by the US Government the town is home to the brightest (and quirkiest) minds in America.

Enter into this mind vault the down-home simple sheriff, Jack Carter. Carter is a modern day Andy Taylor (except Carter carries a gun – even if I can’t ever remember him removing it from his holster). Taking the role of Barney Fife is ex-army ranger, Deputy Jo Lupo (and yowsers…what is it with hot women and big guns? anyone know?). Down the street is Henry Deacon in the Gomer/Goober Pyle role as the town mechanic – who’s also some kind of astro/quantum physicist/mechanic type guy. Carter lives with his daught (opie anyone?) in a “smart house” run and controlled by a computer named SARAH (Aunt Bea – natch). There is also the guy that runs the town’s coffee shop/eatery “Cafe Diem” – who takes the place of Floyd the barber.

There are of course others, a couple of possible love interests for the single dad Carter, and some wacky scientists and engineers thrown into the mix. Overall, it is an enjoyable show – got kinda wonky towards the middle/end of the second season, but seems to be pulling the reigns back in about now.

Microsoft gets...perky?

You may, or may not, know, in the cut-throat, dog-eat-dog (which, by the way, is kinda sick, in a cannibalistic kind of way), Microsoft ranks a distant 3rd. Behind (of course) Google and Yahoo.

No, admittedly, I normally use Google. Why? I dunno, because it is habit I suppose. I used to use Yahoo...heck, everyone used to  use  Yahoo. It was the premier search engine. Lycos and Alta Vista were...meh....ok, but really didn't hold a candle to Yahoo. What I like primarily about Yahoo back in the day, was their simple interface. They had a white page,  with regular old HTML hyperlinks, a regular old HTML text box in which to type your search, and a regular old HTML button you'd use to submit the form.

But they veered away from that. they started adding color, and images, and videos,and advertising. Ok, I don't mind the adverts really. Hey, I am an unabashed capitalist. My belief is, 'If someone, somewhere, isn't making money on this, it should just not be done'. That is, of course, rather simplified....suffice it to say that I don't have any problem with people making money...LOTS of money. But, I digress....

Then, along came Google. I noticed, shortly after Google was launched, that Yahoo's search had a tag line "powered by Google' under their search box. Well, thought I, why am I using Yahoo, and not just going straight to the source? So I started using Google. I like it. It was back to the simple, white page, limited graphics, fast loading web search. They way it should be in my opinion.

The, last year, Microsoft's Live Search is launched. It's ok. It is a search engine, and now-a-days, they are pretty much all the same. I've used it (heh, my own sites come up higher on it than on Google, so I should be happy about that). I've used it, but not used it all that much. Though, it does integrate well with the Microsoft Desktop Search (integrated into Vista, and available for download for XP) which is a great way to find stuff  on your machine (much, much  better than that  stupid dog search thing).

Ok, ok,....I'm getting to a point here...I promise. The thing is, since Microsoft's failed attempt at purchasing Yahoo (the number 2 search engine - in case you didn't know), I'm certain they've been trying to figure out ways to increase the use of Live Search. And now they found something. Microsoft Live Search SearchPerks. SearchPerks is a deal where you earn 'ticket' for each search you perform using Windows Live  Search (up to 25 a day). You have to download a toolbar add-on, and have to be using Microsoft's Internet Explorer 6 or better browser (sadly, Firefox - my default browser - won't work with it). At the end of the SearchPerks promotion (April 15, 2009), you can redeem your tickets for prizes ranging from cookbooks to video games to music downloads to frequent flyer miles. You can even donate your tickets to charity if you want.

Really, not a bad deal at all, to do 25 searches a day, earn the max number of points, and get some free swag. You can find out more at the SearchPerks website.

 

(oh...and uh...sorry about the crappy pun in the title...I couldn't help myself).

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And now, a message from your friendly neighborhood FBI:

Sometimes, you open your email, and you get a gem like I received this morning. Now, I'm used to getting messages from banks I don't use, telling me to login (via the link in the email...natch!) to ensure my account does not get frozen and all my funds (the whole whopping $6.32 of them) are continued to be accessible.

Then, there are what are known as the 'Nigerian Scams' where some guy named Ubuntu (or something along those lines) - sometimes though, it is a girl - who is somehow related to some deposed dictator of some smallish (nearly unheard of) third world country. Their deceased relative is dead, but left a large amount of funds sitting in a bank (usually in the millions of US dollars).

These people are super nice folks. They are willing you pay me a couple hundred thou, just to let them transfer the millions to my bank account so they can get it out of their country, and have access to it. I mean, c'mon, I was born at night, but not LAST night. Idiots don't really know who they are asking. If they transferred that money to my account, I'd end up taking it all out, and moving it out of their reach. Perhaps back to Nigeria, or where ever these rich and powerful people are who can't even influence the banking system in their own country.

But the one this morning, now, usually I just toss those types of emails without even looking at them, but the one this morning was just so awesome, that I could not neglect it. Coming directly from the (apparently) personal email address of the director of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, Robert S. Mueller, III, and bearing the seal of the National Security Branch of the FBI.

Now, I have to hand it to these people as they HAVE gotten the hang of using spell check (finally). Now, if only they could get grammar check working they might have a chance with some who is utilizing more than the 3 brain cells required for looking at pr0n online. Also, they might want to proof-read their messages to look for glaring contradictions.

Anti-Terrorist and Monitory Crimes Division.
Federal Bureau Of Investigation.
J. Edgar. Hoover Building, Washington D.C
Fax Number : (631)-961-3344
ATTN: BENEFICIARY
This is to Officially inform (not 'officially', but 'Officially' that capital 'O', makes you KNOW it is real) you that it has come to our notice and we have thoroughly completed an Investigated (good for them! They completed a verb!) with the help of our Intelligence Monitoring Network System that you are having an illegal transaction (take note of how I have conducted an illegal transaction - we'll need this later) with Impostors claiming to be Prof. Charles C. Soludo of the Central Bank Of Nigeria, Mr. Patrick Aziza, Mr Frank Nweke, none officials of Oceanic Bank, none officials of Zenith Bank and some impostors claiming to be the Federal Bureau Of Investigation agents. During our Investigation, it came to our notice that the reason why you have not received your payment is because you have n Federal Ministry Of Finance (We have a Ministry of Finance? Really? What denomination I wonder) on your behalf and they have brought a solution to your problem (The only problem I have right now, really, is crappy emails like this polluting my inbox, did they solve that? NOOOOOOO) by coordinating your payment in the total amount of $800,000.00 USD which will be deposited into an ATM CARD which you will use to withdraw funds anywhere of the world. You now have the lawful right to claim your funds (Would these funds be the ones that I [allegedly] gained by conducting an illegal transaction? WTH?) which have been deposited into the ATM CARD.
Since the Federal Bureau of Investigation has been involved in this transaction, you are now to be rest assured that this transaction is legitimate and completely risk-free (Wow, now THAT is reassuring, because, at first I thought this was some sort of scam, but as the FBI is involved I KNOW it just HAS to be completely legit - and that whole thing about an illegal transaction...well...probably just a typo made by some secretary in the steno pool) as it is our duty to Protect and Serve citizens of the United States Of America. All you have to do is immediately contact the ATM CARD CENTER via E-mail for instructions on how to procure your Approval Slip which contains details on how to receive and activate your ATM CARD for immediate use to withdraw funds being paid to you. We have confirmed that the amount required to procure the Approval Slip will cost you a total of $250 USD which will be paid directly to the ATM CARD CENTER agent via Western Union Money Transfer / MoneyGram Money Transfer. Below, you shall find contact details of the Agent whom will process your transaction:
CONTACT INFORMATION
NAME: MR. PAUL SMITH
EMAIL: atmcashcardcenter@hotmail.com
Immediately contact Mr. Paul Smith of the ATM Card Centre with the following information:
Full Name:
Address:
City:
State:
Zip Code:
Direct Phone Number:
Current Occupation:
Annual Income:
Once you have sent the required information to Mr. Paul Smith he will contact you with instructions on how to make the payment of $250 USD for the Approval Slip after which he will proceed towards delivery of the ATM CARD without any further delay. You have hereby been authorized/guaranteed by the Federal Bureau Of Investigation to commence towards completing this transaction, as there shall be NO delay once payment for the Approval Slip has been made to the authorized agent.
Once you have completed payment of $250 to the agent in charge of this transaction, immediately contact me back so as to ensure your ATM CARD gets to you rapidly.
FBI Director
Robert Mueller.

NOTE: To ensure you have been AUTHORIZED to pay the required fee's stated above, kindly find below an Authorized Signature and also our Federal Bureau Of Investigation NSB ( National Security Branch ) Seal to accurately guarantee your safety towards completing this transaction.

Authorized Signature

 

 

Movie Thoughts: The Eye

Based on a Chinese movie of the same name (well, except that, the name is in Chinese, instead of English), this movie seems almost typical of horror flicks of late. It seems that gone are the days of Freddy and Jason hacking and slicing up barely dressed, large busted teens (thank gawd), which have been replaced with creepy, hardly seen shadowy, shaky monsters.

The effects are reminiscent of "The Ring" (which I LOVED - being the first of this new style of horror films - at least in the US), though, I think just about anybody could have played the lead role, it seems almost a waste of Jessica Alba's talent. The characters are kind of shallow, but the story is good, even if it is somewhat predictable. I don't even remember ever seeing commercials for this one before, but saw it at the Blockbuster and picked it up anyway (hey, it's got Jessica Alba - who could I NOT pick it up?).

The basic story is, Jessica is a violinist who was blinded at the age of 5. She receives a cornea transplant and is able to see again. But what she sees is not what she expected (queue the 'dum dum duuuummm' music). With her new eyes, she is able to see a kind of thin area between our world, and the next. Where grotesque creatures (who for some reason are really hissy and angry all the time) escort the newly departed (dead) people to where ever they get escorted too.

Now, to me, this isn't one of those "I'll never get that 90 minutes back" movies. However, if I'd never seen it, I wouldn't have missed all that much. It is rather predictable, and I think they spent all their dough getting Alba to play her role. Other than Alba, there really isn't anyone worth noting in the movie.

Another Friday the 13th

Happy bad luck day everyone! Most of you probably don't know, but our little slice of Americana was ravaged by storms last evening. The fam was at a restaurant called "El Mezcal" when the tornado sirens began to blast. Making their annoying-but-attention-getting warble ring and echo through out the city. It was just after we had finished and paid and were ready to leave they began. I ran through the downpour to get the family truckster. Just as I got in, the hail hit, and hit hard. As the hail pummeled the roof of the van, I thought it sounded an awful lot like I would imagine an army of squirrels throwing acorns at the van would sound.

By the time we got home, the weather was beginning to clear, and the sirens had abated. The tornado warning was over. There was a report of one just southeast of town, near a little burg called Berryton. But we managed to remain unscathed...relatively. We had already lost a tree in our front yard in Sunday's storm - mostly anyway. It was a nice redbud tree when we moved in. But over the last 7 years, it has taken a real beating. After Sunday's damage, there were only three branches left on it. It looked anemic. So I cut them down. While I was cutting the second branch, it was so rotted the thing just fell, nearly hitting my intrepid helper, No. 2 Son. We had a good laugh at that.

Last night, however, our satellite TV went kaput. This is not unusual during heavy storms (or even light ones at that). But when it didn't come back this morning, the 5/8 called the Dish folks. Who promptly put us on the schedule...for 2 July. Yes, that is not a misprint. Three weeks sans television. We are seriously considering switching back to cable TV. The problem is, that we pay more for cable, for less. Sure, cable has the local channels in HD, which we don't get with the satellite, but then again, the satellite has the Kung Fu Movie Channel and the Monsters Channel, both in HD. Which cable doesn't offer. Not that we have watched either of those channels hardly at all. But I look at it like a V-8 engine. You probably seldom use it to its potential, but it is nice to know its there.

At any rate. A decision has to be made whether to wait out the three weeks without the idiot box, or make the switch back to Cox cable, and pay more for less. Probably, because I'm such a cheapskate, I'll just wait it out. Besides, when the TV is out, more stuff seems to get done around the house. Or, I could attempt to reset the angle and azimuth of the thing myself. It is worth a try. After all, what am I going to do; make it not work?

GE: Imagine it works

Did I mention how badly General Electric sucks? I think I did, about month and a half to two months ago. The saga with our clothes washer continues to plague us. The confounded thing has once again decided to break. The 5/8 is livid. She called GE's so-called 'Customer Relations'. And was once again told that the washer will be repaired, and not replaced. This comes after the last time (which took a month to fix) we were told if it broke again, they would replace it.

At first, the nice and generous folks at GE told us me they can have someone out to look at (note: 'look at' - not 'fix') the washer on Tuesday.

Me: "Tuesday? You mean today?"
GE Putz: "No sir, next Tuesday."
Me: "Do you mean to tell me that your products are in such a state that all of your authorized repairmen are so busy nobody can get here in less than a week?"
GE Putz: "Everyone is busy Sir, not just us.
Me: "That's not true, I can call 'ACE Plumbing' and they'd be out tomorrow."
GE Putz: "Are they an authorized repair facility? If they are you are welcome to call them."
Me: "How am I supposed to know that? Isn't that your job? To know who is and isn't authorized to repair your junk?"
GE Putz: "Well, we can use a different company than last time. Do you want me to send out 'Dynamic Appliances'?"
Me: "I don't care who you send out. Hell, you could send out my neighbor for all I care, as long as they can fix it before next week."
GE Putz: *puts me on hold again - although only about 5 minutes this time* "Ok, Dynamic Appliance can be out on Friday morning, or Thursday if they can make it."
Me: "But it could be another month before its fixed right? If they have to order parts?"
GE Putz: "That's unlikely..."
Me: "Yeah, that's what I would have thought too, until last time. What will it take to get this thing just replaced?"
GE Putz: "We won't replace it as long as it is repairable."
Me: "Umm...ok, but where is my confidence that it will stay repaired?"
GE Putz: "I don't understand."
Me: "Ok, I have had this washer for about 6 months, and I have gotten maybe 4 months of use out of it. It seems it is in a constant state of repair. After this repair, how can I have any confidence that it will not break down again next month? This washer is a lemon. It get repaired, and then breaks again right away."
GE Putz: "If it breaks again right away, you need to call the repair facility that repaired it."
Me: "It isn't the repairmen that do a bad job of repairing it. It is your crappy parts that keep breaking, how can I get better parts?"
GE Putz: "Sir, all authorized repair facilities use proper GE parts"
Me: "Yes, but those are the parts that keep breaking. Is there another manufacturer for parts for your junk that maybe has some sort of quality control that I can rest assured they parts won't break next month?"
GE Putz: "The repair facilities use the proper parts."

I new it was going nowhere. So, at the end of the week, some repair guy will come out, look at the washer. Note, he is going to 'look' at the washer, not necessarily 'fix' the washer. My guess is that he will have to order parts. And if past performance is in any way indicative of future promises, those parts will be on back order. And probably take another month to get here. If that is the case, I'm going to buy a new washer. Then I'll have one for when this piece of fecal matter breaks down again.

And believe you me, I will make damn certain it will break down as often as possible. I will wash the rankest, heaviest and nastiest crap in that washing machine I can think of. I will over-fill it on a regular basis and basically treat it like garbage so that I make them asshats come out very couple of weeks if I can. I won't care because I'll have another washer that can be used for real work.

Next time I'll ask them if GE's blurb line should read "Imagine it works" instead of "Imagination at work." Don't you just hate it when you come up with a good zinger like that just a bit too late? I've got it saved now though, and will definitely use it with the next GE Putz I have to speak with.

Mmmmmm bratwurst...

It started out as a mostly uneventful weekend over here in fly-over country. There is a church here, Sacred Heart, which has traditionally serviced the German immigrant community. Not that there are all that many German immigrants to Topeka any more. But there was a time. There was a time, when a good portion of the Oakland neighborhood we populated by people from the "old country" so to speak.

I remember gramma Sachs fondly. She wasn't really my grandmother, and I'm not 100% on why we called her 'gramma' growing up. But that is really neither here nor there. I remember the smell of her kitchen. It seems she was always make her krautstrudal. I loved that stuff. Now, when mom made it, she made more or less individual portions. She would make maybe ten or twelve smaller strudels. But gramma Sachs...gramma Sachs would make this gigantic log of strudel. I always like that better, probably because it could fit more meat in it that way.

Sacred Heart every year has their "Germanfest" fundraiser in early June. Our Lady of Guadalupe has their "Fiesta Mexicana" in July. These are the two big cultural celebrations (ok, not counting St. Paddy's Day) the Topeka has. And the last time I went to Fiesta (a couple of years ago) I was not terribly impressed. Oddly enough, the two churches, Sacred Heart and Gualdalupe, are within a mile of each other, in the same Oakland neighborhood. The neighborhood, once ripe with heavily accented German immigrants, is now populated by heavily accented Hispanic immigrants. But that didn't stop an enormous crowd from gathering at Sacred Heart's Germanfest of good food and decent beer.

All the food at the Germanfest is hand made. Even the noodles, and the breads. All made from scratch which is what makes the event so good. There isn't much for the kids. A few things, but those are mostly for the really young kids, around 5 or so. Mine were told old to have much fun there. But the food was good, and the beer, while being regular, every day America lager, still went down smoothly. And the strudel, brats, sauerkraut and sausages were divine. I don't know if the ladies of the parish actually hand-made the sausage, but it wouldn't surprise me a bit.

The Germanfest runs from Saturday evening through Sunday evening. I've discovered that Sunday is the better day to go. Mainly because they have the beer garde open. I like to give the kids a dollar, and let them go about what ever it is they like doing, while I relax in the beer garden and people watch. But Saturday, the beer garden was nowhere to be found. So I ended up sitting under a big tent listening to the Hayden High School Drumline.

Now, those kids aren't back, not bad at all. But they also don't hold a candled to the THS Drumline. The kids from THS just seem to have more...I don't...passion? yeah, for lack of a better term, I'll call it passion. The Hayden kids were very technical, but didn't have any heart. I have no doubt they hit 98% of the beats (notes?) correctly and in time. But they had the blank expressions of mannequins. They didn't smile, they hardly moved. They played, but did not put on a show.